Foreign Service Officers (i.e. U.S. “diplomats”) are Congressionally mandated to spend a decent amount of time in the United States between tours – presumably so that we maintain a good understanding of our home countries while we’re out representing America to other countries. This means is that every 2-3 years, between foreign tours, we’re required to spend a month or so at home, getting to know our country again. It’s called “home leave,” and it can be expensive, unless you spending the month holed up in your parents’ basement to save money. Not that my parents have a basement. ANYhoo…
My 15-year-old came up with a great way to spend our first (and likely my daughters’ last) home leave: rent an RV and go cruising up and down the Western states for a week or two. So we’re driving this giant rig from Eugene, Oregon, as far south as out budget will allow, for the next couple of weeks. Here’s how our trip started:
So why is “Fast Food” in the title of this blog post? Well, one of the unexplained phenomena that occurs when Americans spend years outside the country – especially with teens – is that we develop an unexplained, and often unhealthy obsession with American Fast Food. This, in spite of being able to step back and observe its effects on American society. And in our case, we’ve spent the better part of the time between July 2007 and…well, last week – outside the United States. For the last couple of years, the only thing remotely “fast” and “American” has been KFC (which is remarkably popular in Namibia, but that’s for another blog post). So a big part of this Western States Odyssey is about satisfying our cravings for all of the fast food we have missed out on.
And we make quite a sight, walking in to these establishments. Empty Taco Bell, in walk four Americans as the only customers, and the cashier stares at us as we deliberately stay back a bit, in order to carefully study the menu, oohing and aahing at the offerings. “Uh, just a minute – we’re studying the menu.” Who needs to study the menu at Taco Bell?
You see, the menu DOES change. You may not notice – it’s like not noticing when a family member’s hair grows. But try leaving for a couple of years and see if there’s a difference.
So … what was so amazing about Taco Bell (other than its always pleasant affordability)?
Taco shells made out of Doritos! Cool ranch OR nacho cheese flavor. Who comes up with that?!? And fluffy deep fried things from Cinnabon filled with whipped cream! Mmmmm….yummy unhealthy American goodness! And a whole bunch of other things…but I couldn’t break away from the cool ranch Dorito taco shells.
You people really should not take these things for granted.
Next: Burger King!
